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Monday, 8 July 2013

Are You Irish? Or Malaysian


You know you're Irish when...

You'll know you'll pass your exams because your Granny lit a candle for you.

You thank bus drivers.

You show your love for friends and family by insulting them.



• You can call someone mad and mean it as a compliment.

• You touch the electric fence for craic (fun).

• You ask “Howaya?” (How are you?) but never wait for a reply

• The best reason to do something is for the craic.

• Flat coke or 7Up heals all illnesses

• You know all the lyrics to every one of Neil Diamond’s songs

• You whole-heartedly believe "Tayto - Cheese 'n Onion" crisps is the national dish
• All your phone calls end in "Right bye bye, bye bye, bye."




AND, you'll know you're Malaysian when...

"
You know when to use "lah", "leh", "lo", "lor", "meh", and "ma" all correctly

You know the pros and cons of using DiGi, Maxis and Celcom

"Why do like this meh?" is a completely okay question to ask

You don't go out if it rains. Or even the day after it rains if it's a bad storm. Actually the rain stops all plans, and who wants to deal with the jam anyways??


You think of KL people as city folk

"We see how first" are words to live by

You know the words for "eat" and "tea" in Tamil, Malay, and a few dialects of Chinese

Complaining about how hot it is outside while soaking in the aircon/ fan is a completely justifiable way to spend a day



You go on Facebook, twitter, and 9gag for 7 hours straight

School holiday? Sleep until noon

You know you should be studying but instead go on to twitter to complain about how much homework you have to do

Shaving is optional


You know whether to call someone "anne" or "abang" (Malay and Tamil for “Older Brother")

You'd rather call a women that looks slightly older "kakak" (Malaysian for "Older sister") than deal with the consequences of calling an older looking woman that's young "mak cik" (Auntie)

Crossing a busy street? No problem, use the hand

You know how to use chopsticks and eat with your hands


You've slowly forgotten how to eat with a knife...

You know what food stall at the canteen has the best food on what days

There are people in your class that speak better English than you

You know exactly what drama went down on twitter last night


You always take a Chinese friend with you to eat dimsum because the
dimsum women always try and rip you off

People back in the Ireland don't understand your English

It's really hard to understand a non-Malaysian accent

It's really difficult to form an English sentence without using a Malay or Chinese word


You've used the phrase "special discount untuk mat salleh boleh cakap bahasa melayu" (Special discount for any foreigner who can speak Malay) countless times


You get really angry when someone thinks you're a tourist

Hearing someone talking about you in Malay and approaching them and
saying "saya boleh faham bm" (I can understand Malay) is the best. Thing. Ever.

You've learned to not be offended when a Chinese or a Malay auntie tells
you how fat you've gotten

What’s app is crucial to survival


You can't go more than one week without eating roti canai or nasi lemak...

... Or one day without eating some form of Nasi (rice)

You know what night market is open when and where

You can tell what app someone is using on their phone based on the sound it plays


Life without roti scares the living daylights out of you

You know the LRT and Monorail system better than most Malaysians

There is no such thing as too much milo (Malaysian chocolate drink)


You started saying going back to Ireland instead of going home, because Malaysia is home

The thought of leaving Malaysia makes you cry. Really, really hard."


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